Empowerment, Encouragement, self growth, Uncategorized, Wellness

The FREEING in Forgiveness  

True Forgiveness

I believe many Christians have a misconception about the true process and meaning of forgiveness.  Because of these myths I’ve come across many people carrying enormous amount of guilt and obligation. This guilt and obligation can lead to an unhappy and unfulfilled life.  They carry an unnecessary yoke around their neck because the false ideas of forgiveness. In my course of growing and healing from my past…I’ve learn two important points about forgiveness:

1) Forgiveness has EVERYTHING to do with you. Forgiveness frees you from guilt, shame, fear and obligation.  It allows you to let go of all the unhealthy emotional baggage you carried from the hurt and pain done to you. Forgiving someone who has wronged you places the power back in your hands and out of the wrong doer.  Your forgiveness basically is saying that, although I have a justified reason to be angry or upset with you, I am choosing to exercise grace and mercy.  Freely giving this grace and mercy towards your wrong doer opens the prison doors where the two of you were held captive.  This opening of the prison cells gives you the emotional power to walk out free!

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2) Forgiveness doesn’t mean you have to allow the wrong doer back into your life.  Many people are silent sufferers who have been lead to believe that if I choose to no longer allow the wrong doer in my life than I haven’t truly forgiven them.  Let me tell you my friends this is not true. Some who have wronged you will recognize and acknowledge their wrong doing and sincerely apologize and show this apology through their course of actions.  These types of relationships can most often have the potential for mending and restoration.  However, there will also be times although forgiveness has taken place, due to the toxicity of the person; the relationship will not be mended.  If you find that the person you have forgiven still has unhealthy behavior traits that are not beneficial to your wellbeing and growth, then perhaps this is a person you must love at a distance.  Loving someone at a distance means that you don’t harbor any animosity, anger or resentment there is genuine love carried within your heart for the person’s wellbeing. However, you have come to a place in your journey of growth and self-discovery where you have realized that some people (which could include a family member) are not emotionally healthy individuals and therefore not emotionally healthy for you so boundaries are placed for your sanity and peace.

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I am a living witness to this journey and process. I have experienced true freedom and peace of mind by making the brave and bold decisions of removing unhealthy individuals from my life. True forgiveness is a transformation that happens in the heart…it’s an experience and process between you and God. This is why you mustn’t allow “other people’s opinions” affect you on how you choose to handle a relationship with someone who has wronged you.  Your choice is between you and God through your personal prayers, devotions and mediation that leads you to make the healthiest decision for you concerning the relationship.

I encourage anyone who is in a toxic relationship, rather if it’s a boyfriend, friend, mother or father or whoever it may be. Do not allow yourself to rot within those prison cells.  Take the steps to true forgiveness and healing…remember forgiveness has EVERYTHING to do with freeing and healing you.

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Encouragement, Inspiration, life, Uncategorized, Wellness

Despite it ALL 

  

As a grown up I’ve come to realize that the “Happy” in “Happy Thanksgiving” doesn’t apply to the masses. In fact it is around the holiday season that most people feel the loneliest. My thoughts always go to the widows, single mothers, dysfunctional family’s, parents who’ve lost children and children who’ve lost parents. My heart goes out to every struggling person trying to survive. The true meaning of Thanksgiving I believe has gotten lost in the commercialized version. True authentic Thanksgiving is not about Black Friday deals, watching football, stuffing our faces with food or family’s getting together just for tradition sake..it’s about reflecting and remembering that despite all you or your family has gone through there’s still something to be thankful for. For some, their despite it all, is that they still have a roof over their head, for others it may be having the security of a job, it could be having solid friendships who have been there to help in your time of need. Despite it all could be you have a clean bill of health or you are in your right frame of mind despite all the hardship.  

  
For me my despite it all is that through all the hardships and heartaches I still have spiritual wellbeing my Creator has kept my sanity, given me peace and joy. Despite it all I still have a loving husband and three healthy sons. Despite it all I know who I am, whose I am, my value and purpose. I walk in these truths and its in knowing these things I find my Thanksgiving! 

  
I don’t know what your despite it all may be but I do know if you stop and think for a minute you can identify some…for we all our overcomers of something…I encourage you to think and reflect on those things you have overcome and find your true Thanksgiving today.   

  

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Empowerment, Encouragement, Inspiration, life, Motivation, self growth, Uncategorized

Reflections of a Writer 

  
Ever since I answered the calling for me to write it has been such an amazing journey. Starting my blog, having one of my poems published and completing my first manuscript has been SO exciting! But it’s funny how now looking at that same manuscript and the task of typing up ALL those pages of writing seems daunting. The same thing that brought excitement to me now brings pain. Now don’t get me wrong I am so grateful to have been given this gift of writing. God has blessed me with many more book ideas to write once I complete this book project. I am just reflecting the personal joys and pains on a journey to accomplishing life goals. By sharing my personal experience my hope is that it can bring inspiration and encouragement to others embarking on their own journeys. 

It’s funny how in life the same thing that can bring happiness can bring sorrow.  Take raising children, marriage, relationships or even starting a new career.  Each one of these journey’s come with an array of emotions, challenges and its rewards.  You see our journey’s our filled with highs and lows…bumps and turns. This is why we must embrace EVERY part of the process the good and the bad for it is in the mixture of both that we receive our greatest blessings and life lessons.  

Be encourage today on whatever life’s journey you are on rather it be completing a college degree, training for a marathon, writing your first book, starting your own business or etc. Trust that the process will lead you to fulfilling your goals. You have to believe  and know in your inner spirit that no matter how long it takes or how many obstacles you face…God WILL complete what He began in you! So KEEP MOVING FORWARD! 

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